Friday, June 23, 2006

Fat Calves

Okay heres what I don't get, I am not saying I don't like it, or that I want it to stop, I am just saying I don't get it...For those guys reading this, here is an insight in to the world of girls...

Lots of girls are very selfconsious, whether its their hips, their butt, their thighs, their nose, thier hair, thier outfit, their boobs, their gut, their ears, their hands, their feet, their muscles and thats just a start. But there is one body part that you could pretty much leave of that list and that is the calve muscle. But guess what, over the last little while I have become very selfconsious about my calves, and for very good reason I feel.

Like most people I like to keep up with fashion, and part of this years winter fashion is wearing long boots, so because I don't have any, Mum decided a little while ago that she would try and get me some boots, so as you do in the shoe shop I sat down and took my other shoes off and started trying them on. But as it turns out I have fat calves, and none fitted, so after about 100 pairs of boots, nice ones, ugly ones, tall ones, shorter ones, expensive ones and cheap ones still none fitted, even the shop assistant gave up.

Anyway even though i decided the dream of boots should die, mum did not. So today for some strange reason we tried agian, except this time I was ready. I went into the shop and said "I need some boots, i have fat calves" and the lady said the classic line "Your calves aren't big, we can find some" and exactly the same thing happened again. No boots for Emma, So now I think that I have fat calves, i am blaming my little feet, but I am not really sure, maybe I do have obese calve muscles.

Okay so I guess you are thinking whats not to get??? Here it is.....How does anyone get obese calve muscles, why can't I get boots??? Why do I always see people with MUCH larger legs, i would even go as far as saying fat legs, than me wearing boots??? Is it even possible to have fat calves???

Just a thought

Stay tunned.

6 comments:

Shirl said...

Em,

I am really sorry about your calves, I just want you to know that it is NOT my fault! I think you should look at your father's family for somewhere to start placing blame. Having worn boots for most of my life I can only imagine how frustrating this must be for you. However, I am not prepared to give up on the search for boots for you. In fact, I have seen this great pair in Aussie Disposals that might just do the trick. What colour rubber do you like? I've seen them in black, white, or even green for that matter. They may even come with a free pair of overalls to go with them. Only joking! But I will keep looking. We must be able to get some somewhere. Don't give up!

Wendy said...

Ummm, what about a nice pair of little, short boots to wear with jeans????? As for blame, I think the blame lies squarely with the boot manufacturers and not your calves (or your father's family).

Miriam said...

Hey Em!

Let's get something straight... You DON'T have fat calves. You were blessed with two beautiful heads of gastrocnemius and a sexy soleus! God bless anatomy...

Just curious, who's your mystery international caller? Any updates?

Freindy said...

Let me refer to the line of a song which says "these boots are made for walking." Long boots surely are not made for walking, especially if they're hard work to get into. Therefore, I think you should go with some more practical boots...gumboots maybe. You should start the fashion. Not only are they cool, but they keep your feet dry. Don't conform to the ways of this world. Be a revolutionary! One day, maybe you'll be able to go to the shop wearing gumboots and say, "check out these boots! These boots are made for walking, and that's just what they'll do. One of these days these boots are gonna walk all over you!" Yeah! You tell those shoe shops!
I'm tired..

Anonymous said...

Seriously this is a problem, because i hear about everytime we go to a shop. Taht combined with, 'i can't find nice jeans that don't show my butt crack' is enough to make you never want to go shopping again.

Dave said...

But i still love you and your 'fat calves'